Quizzie + Rant
Answer all questions using only 1 word
1. Where is your cell phone? Bed
2. Relationship? Single
3. Your hair? Growing
4. Work? Lazy
5. Your sister? 2
6. Your favorite thing? DVDs
7. Your dream last night? Secret
8. Your favorite drink? Vodka
9. Your dream car? Smartcar
10. The room you’re in? Bedroom
11. Your shoes? Slippers
12. Your fears? Spiders
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? Famous
14. Who did you hang out with this weekend? Emily
15. What you’re not good at? Revising
16. Muffin? Yum
17. One of your wish list items? Sexplz
18. Where you grew up? Horsham
19. The last thing you did? Readfic
20. What are you wearing? Hoodie
21. What aren’t you wearing? Makeup
22. Your pet. Goats
23. Your computer? Crap
24. Your life? Examfull
25. Your mood? Irritated
26. Missing? Goodfic
27. What are you thinking about right now? BadficARGH
28. Your car? Bike
29. Your kitchen? Parents'
30. Your summer? Job D:
31. Your favorite colour? Orange
32. When is the last time you laughed? Today
33. Last time you cried? Ages
34. School? Tomorrow D:
35. Love. Money
No, I don't count D: as a word :P
Readfic is one word, as is BadficARGH.
So, time for a rant. There are some movies, books, TV shows and similar that do not encourage bad fanfiction. However, whatever they are, I am not a fan of any of them. Everything I love seems to be designed deliberately to encourage the fanbrats to write steaming piles of shit.
Phantom of the Opera has the following:
- Often fancied male characters
- Angst
- Virgins of both sexes
- Violence
- Insanity
- Love triangles
- Two male characters who hate eachother
So, from this, we get Mary Sues, 'angstfics' written by 13 year old emos, over emotional badly written 'loss of virginity' scenes, torture (sexual or otherwise) written by 13 year olds, stream of consciousness writing, threesomes, more angst and pointless, retarded and completely illogical slashfic. Complete with 13 year old girls writing gay sex, without the slightest idea what they're talking about.
Hmm, maybe Labyrinth. Labyrinth is a CHILDREN'S film. It must be safe. And it's funny, so no angsting. Right? RIGHT?!
Wrong. Labyrinth has:
- Young, innocent girl + bad guy
- A mild romance element
- Rejection
- Magic
- An often fancied male character
So, here the fanfic has sex scenes bordering on pedophilia, sadistic sex, random pointless pornographic sex, angsting, anything-goes-because-magic-explains-it-all fanfics, and Mary Sues. Christ there's a lot of Mary Sues.
The Matrix... I think that's an obvious one for problems. But unless you take a look at the fanfic, you have no idea how many.
The Matrix has:
- SuperpowersLAWL
- Two male characters who hate eachother (here we go again...)
- Cool clothes
- Character with unique powers that it is specifically stated no one else has
- Multiple copies of same person
The biggest problem here is Mary Sues, the 'other One' or similar, as well as Mary Sues who have sex with Neo, Smith or all the damn agents at once if it pleases them to do so. Also loving descriptions of Mary Sues in leather outfits and sunglasses that go on for PAGES. There's also LOVELY Smith/Smith fic, and do I even need to explain what the slash fans do with Neo and Smith?
Thought not.
There's other examples I could go into. Anne Rice, in particular, sets herself up for badfic. But recently mai luff Emily introduced me to Red Dwarf. 26 hours not being enough for me, I wandered into the world of fanfiction. And then remembered all the reasons why that was a bad, bad idea.
- Male pregnancy = canon
- Two male characters who hate eachother
- Almost entirely male cast
- Men trapped in space with no women
- Pleasure GELFs
- Artificial Reality & Total Immersion Video Games
- Alternative Universes = canon
- Multiple copies of same person
- Psimoons
- Abilities to read people's minds in various ways (Dream Recorder, etc)
So, what fanfic do we get? Bad slash. Lots and lots of stupid, over the top, angsty slash. This dominates so much that there aren't as many Mary Sues as you'd expect, but the ones you do get are really really bad. Pleasure GELFs (life forms that appear as a person's ideal partner) are always an easy option. There's not as much MPREG as you'd expect, but it's there and it's nasty. Instead of character developement and having a character confess their feelings for another character in the normal way, you have a dream recorder so people just find shit out. AR and TIV allows all kinds of weird sex situations, there's plenty of self/self pairings like you get in The Matrix. The episode Terrorform brought up the idea of the 'lust monster', and so THAT gets written a lot. Alternative universes mean you can make everyone gay without explanation.
I don't like seeing people fuck with characters and stories that I like, damnit. I mean, to be fair, there are some excuses for slash in RD, but there are NO excuses for cutsey scenes of grown men acting like teenage girls. R/L is never going to be a pairing I like (though compared to Neo/Smith, Harry/Snape or Voldemort, Erik/Raoul and such, it almost makes sense), but if people must write it they could at least write R/L, rather than give two teenage girls rediculously out of proportion penises and have them giggle at eachother for a few pages.
*sigh* Either Godawful.net needs to come back to amuse me, or I should give up fanfic for a while. It makes me too angry.
(Btw, note for teh sistar Immi. If these examples don't interest or anger you, take a look in the LOTR sections on some fanfic sites. It'll make your eyes bleed. Especially if you manage to find a copy of 'Celebrian' or 'Legolas by Laura' somewhere :P).
1. Where is your cell phone? Bed
2. Relationship? Single
3. Your hair? Growing
4. Work? Lazy
5. Your sister? 2
6. Your favorite thing? DVDs
7. Your dream last night? Secret
8. Your favorite drink? Vodka
9. Your dream car? Smartcar
10. The room you’re in? Bedroom
11. Your shoes? Slippers
12. Your fears? Spiders
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? Famous
14. Who did you hang out with this weekend? Emily
15. What you’re not good at? Revising
16. Muffin? Yum
17. One of your wish list items? Sexplz
18. Where you grew up? Horsham
19. The last thing you did? Readfic
20. What are you wearing? Hoodie
21. What aren’t you wearing? Makeup
22. Your pet. Goats
23. Your computer? Crap
24. Your life? Examfull
25. Your mood? Irritated
26. Missing? Goodfic
27. What are you thinking about right now? BadficARGH
28. Your car? Bike
29. Your kitchen? Parents'
30. Your summer? Job D:
31. Your favorite colour? Orange
32. When is the last time you laughed? Today
33. Last time you cried? Ages
34. School? Tomorrow D:
35. Love. Money
No, I don't count D: as a word :P
Readfic is one word, as is BadficARGH.
So, time for a rant. There are some movies, books, TV shows and similar that do not encourage bad fanfiction. However, whatever they are, I am not a fan of any of them. Everything I love seems to be designed deliberately to encourage the fanbrats to write steaming piles of shit.
Phantom of the Opera has the following:
- Often fancied male characters
- Angst
- Virgins of both sexes
- Violence
- Insanity
- Love triangles
- Two male characters who hate eachother
So, from this, we get Mary Sues, 'angstfics' written by 13 year old emos, over emotional badly written 'loss of virginity' scenes, torture (sexual or otherwise) written by 13 year olds, stream of consciousness writing, threesomes, more angst and pointless, retarded and completely illogical slashfic. Complete with 13 year old girls writing gay sex, without the slightest idea what they're talking about.
Hmm, maybe Labyrinth. Labyrinth is a CHILDREN'S film. It must be safe. And it's funny, so no angsting. Right? RIGHT?!
Wrong. Labyrinth has:
- Young, innocent girl + bad guy
- A mild romance element
- Rejection
- Magic
- An often fancied male character
So, here the fanfic has sex scenes bordering on pedophilia, sadistic sex, random pointless pornographic sex, angsting, anything-goes-because-magic-explains-it-all fanfics, and Mary Sues. Christ there's a lot of Mary Sues.
The Matrix... I think that's an obvious one for problems. But unless you take a look at the fanfic, you have no idea how many.
The Matrix has:
- SuperpowersLAWL
- Two male characters who hate eachother (here we go again...)
- Cool clothes
- Character with unique powers that it is specifically stated no one else has
- Multiple copies of same person
The biggest problem here is Mary Sues, the 'other One' or similar, as well as Mary Sues who have sex with Neo, Smith or all the damn agents at once if it pleases them to do so. Also loving descriptions of Mary Sues in leather outfits and sunglasses that go on for PAGES. There's also LOVELY Smith/Smith fic, and do I even need to explain what the slash fans do with Neo and Smith?
Thought not.
There's other examples I could go into. Anne Rice, in particular, sets herself up for badfic. But recently mai luff Emily introduced me to Red Dwarf. 26 hours not being enough for me, I wandered into the world of fanfiction. And then remembered all the reasons why that was a bad, bad idea.
- Male pregnancy = canon
- Two male characters who hate eachother
- Almost entirely male cast
- Men trapped in space with no women
- Pleasure GELFs
- Artificial Reality & Total Immersion Video Games
- Alternative Universes = canon
- Multiple copies of same person
- Psimoons
- Abilities to read people's minds in various ways (Dream Recorder, etc)
So, what fanfic do we get? Bad slash. Lots and lots of stupid, over the top, angsty slash. This dominates so much that there aren't as many Mary Sues as you'd expect, but the ones you do get are really really bad. Pleasure GELFs (life forms that appear as a person's ideal partner) are always an easy option. There's not as much MPREG as you'd expect, but it's there and it's nasty. Instead of character developement and having a character confess their feelings for another character in the normal way, you have a dream recorder so people just find shit out. AR and TIV allows all kinds of weird sex situations, there's plenty of self/self pairings like you get in The Matrix. The episode Terrorform brought up the idea of the 'lust monster', and so THAT gets written a lot. Alternative universes mean you can make everyone gay without explanation.
I don't like seeing people fuck with characters and stories that I like, damnit. I mean, to be fair, there are some excuses for slash in RD, but there are NO excuses for cutsey scenes of grown men acting like teenage girls. R/L is never going to be a pairing I like (though compared to Neo/Smith, Harry/Snape or Voldemort, Erik/Raoul and such, it almost makes sense), but if people must write it they could at least write R/L, rather than give two teenage girls rediculously out of proportion penises and have them giggle at eachother for a few pages.
*sigh* Either Godawful.net needs to come back to amuse me, or I should give up fanfic for a while. It makes me too angry.
(Btw, note for teh sistar Immi. If these examples don't interest or anger you, take a look in the LOTR sections on some fanfic sites. It'll make your eyes bleed. Especially if you manage to find a copy of 'Celebrian' or 'Legolas by Laura' somewhere :P).
posted by Cleo at 3:54 pm
4 Comments:
I should do that. I read a mad, mad Harry Potter fanfic once. No Harry/Voldemort tho (eww).
Buffy seems to have rather good fanfic, as it happens. But don't read it till you've watched Buffy or you'll miss the point. :-)
Maybe I should get into watching Buffy XD I badly need some goodfic D:
Look, I realise that you may not like those pairings, but I do, with the exceptions of Rimmer/Lister, Harry/Snape and Erik/Raoul.
It seems to me that the point you are making here is that it's bad just because it involves two males having sex with each other. I apoligize if that is not what you are saying, but that is the way you came across.
Also, I don't think the world of fanfic really is chock full of those pairings you have mentioned. Neo/Smith slashfics take hours to find once the ten or so on ff.net are finished. Harry/Voldemort isn't altogether common either. Really, if you don't like these pairings, then why did you bother searching for them?
Anonymous,
I have no problem with 2 males having sex. Or 2 females. Or one of each. Or, in fact, anything else you can think of. I have a problem with the abuse of canon. Making straight characters gay or gay characters straight. Making characters who hate eachother fuck. Making characters do anything that they would never do. I don't mind people developing the characters away from what the original writer intended, but when you make the characters behave like completely different people you might as well write original fic and have done.
I don't search for these pairings (although I do enjoy browsing godawful.com for some of the best of the worst) but they do pop up, more often than I'd like. Some I've talked about here (Erik/Raoul and Rimmer/Lister especially) are insanely popular - even if they weren't rediculous, I'd have an issue with the sheer amount of them drowning out everything else. Others are rarer but just as batshit.
By the way, 'Anonymous', watch who you call homophobic. I'm bisexual myself and the only group I am prejudiced against are shitty fanfiction writers (and, well, religious people too. But that's a whole other rant).
Post a Comment
<< Home